Nurturers and the Nine Ways They Nurture

Written by Published in StrengthsFinder Themes
Nurturers nurture

The Nine Ways that Nurturers Nurture


If your Top 5 StrengthsFinder talent themes are dominant in the Relationship Building Domain, then you like to serve others. In our work, we very simply call these Nurturers. They are naturals at uplifting, empowering others.


Nurturers nurture in a variety of ways. Some bend and flex as they lead others through change. Others sense and feel and have a knowing about people without a word ever being said. They focus their warm energy on keeping the peace, or taking care of those who they are most close to. Many of them are upbeat, genuine and sincere and they make sure that no one gets left behind. Here are the nine ways that these Nurturers build and maintain relationships:


Nurturers nurture

Nurturers Nurture in a variety of ways.


1. Adaptability


Some NURTURERS are adaptable. They accommodate when change happens and they easily transition and lead others to do the same. Change is “no big deal” to them — truly! In fact, they expect change and they like variety. They just “go with the flow” and “bend in the wind” and when you ask them if they want coffee or tea and they say, “Either one is fine,” they really mean it.


2. Connectedness


Other NURTURERS are deeply spiritual and have a sense that we are connected in mysterious ways. They feel that we are all responsible for one another and want to be part of a group, team or community. They are constantly connecting the dots and tying everything and everyone together. And they know that whatever happens, “It was meant to be,” because there’s something bigger than all of us holding it all together.


3. Developer


Many NURTURERS are focused on developing others. They see potential and they notice the small steps of progress that people make in their growth. They nudge people along by celebrating them as they move forward, uplifting them as they anticipate their next movements forward. They pour their energy, time and resources into other people, as they empower them to advance to the next level.


Nurturer, Developer

Nurturers strong in Developer love to help others grow.


4. Empathy


There are some NURTURERS who have a “knowing” about others. They know when they are sad, angry, happy, frustrated or depressed. They may even feel what others feel physically — in their own bodies. They use this gift to meet the needs of others without any explanations — they don’t need them because they just “know.” They measure the temperature of emotions of those around them, even of those they don’t know. People are instinctively drawn to them because they recognize they are intuitive.


5. Harmony


Other NURTURERS are peacekeepers. They strive for peace and harmony, avoid conflict and make sure that in the event on a confrontation, everybody’s story is heard. They are excellent negotiators because they look for a win/win. They may not share their own feelings or thoughts in a situation if they are contrary to the status quo because they just don’t want to “rock the boat,” especially if it caused contention. They bring unity and balance to relationships.


6. Includer


Those NURTURERS who notice those who are on the outside want to include them in whatever the rest of the group is doing. They notice if others are excluded or on the peripheral, and they look for ways to bring them in, make them feel welcomed and part of the community. They are non-judgmental and accepting of all because everybody matters.


Nurturer, Includer

Nurturers who are strong in Includer want to welcome others to the group.


7.  Individualization


There are some NURTURERS who are fascinated by the uniqueness of each and every person. They notice differences and appreciate the subtle nuances in talent of each individual. They hate stereotypes and want to customize and tailor programs and plans so that each person has the opportunity to be the best that they can be. They intuitively know how to alter things so that each person has a chance to shine.


8.  Positivity


Some NURTURERS are happy and joyful all the time. They are always looking at the good in nearly any situation. They have a flair for the dramatic and infuse enthusiasm and excitement into whatever they are doing. They uplift others with their upbeat energy and work hard to make sure others do not fall into the doldrums. When things seem dire, they will find the silver lining and focus on that instead of the negative. As a result, they can move others forward quickly.


9. Relator


NURTURERS who look for depth in their relationships have the ability to relate with people in a more extensive way. They want more dimensions in their associations. They are comfortable with intimacy with their closest companions and expect transparency, authenticity and confidentiality. They are champions of those who are part of their “inner circle” and are often excellent mentors to those they know well.


Nurturers, Relator

Nurturers with Relator are the real deal: authentic and transparent


Nurturing the Nurturers


Regardless of how NURTURERS build relationships, nurturing is what they do. They genuinely care about other people. To get the most from their natural talents and gifts, make sure they are around people where their intuition and warm energy is best suited.




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Rhonda Knight Boyle is the founder of several networking and personal growth enterprises including Women in the Know, Connect & Serve, and Activate Your Strengths. She is also co-owner of StrengthsAssociates, a consulting company using StrengthsFinder 2.0 methodology to foster personal development and professional growth.  She can be heard on the OklahomaTalkingCo podcast network and is the host of the Activate Your Strengths Show. You can reach Rhonda at, or follow them on Facebook at They can also be found under the Twitter handle of ActivateStrong.

Rhonda Knight Boyle